Welcome back to The Awakened Self Podcast! I’m Gianna Badot, and today I want to dive into a topic that so many of us experience but rarely talk about openly—how the journey of self-improvement can sometimes feel like self-punishment. If you’ve ever felt worse after starting a healing or growth journey, you are definitely not alone. In fact, this is one of the biggest obstacles I see in my work as a certified hypnotherapist and holistic coach.

Why Does Self-Improvement Sometimes Make Us Feel Worse?

Let’s be real—working on yourself is supposed to feel empowering and transformative. But too often, people (myself included, at times) start a self-development journey and quickly find themselves in a darker place than before. Why? It often comes down to activating our shadow self, that inner critic who loves to turn up the volume any time we shine the spotlight on our growth or faults.

This shadow side is relentless—it’s the voice that tells us we’re not good enough, not successful enough, or not worthy of love and joy. For perfectionists, this voice gets even louder. As soon as you start focusing on the parts of yourself that need healing or growth, your inner critic can shift self-improvement from an act of self-care to what feels like self-torture.

It’s Not All Doom and Gloom: You’re Not Broken

Here’s something I want you to hear loud and clear: self-improvement is not just for fixing something “wrong” with you. Sometimes, you’re simply motivated by the desire to be better, to achieve more, or to evolve. Both reasons—to heal or to thrive—are valid! But regardless of your motivation, chances are your inner critic will make an appearance.

Our Focus Shapes Our Experience

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned (and shared repeatedly with clients) is that what you focus on expands. If you’re constantly highlighting what’s “wrong” or what needs fixing, your life starts to feel like an endless list of problems. Society and social media don’t help—we’re bombarded with messages that say we need to be better, do more, buy more, and “fix” everything about ourselves.

But changing this experience is possible. We can start at the conscious level: take inventory of the content you consume, from the social media accounts you follow to the people you interact with. Unfollow those that don’t inspire positivity or self-love. This is a simple but powerful first step.

The Deeper Work: Rewiring the Subconscious

If you find that your negative self-talk goes deeper—maybe it’s been there since childhood—it’s time to turn inward. The beliefs and programming you picked up when you were young shape your life today without you even realizing it. This “tape” that says you’re not enough is likely running in your subconscious, responsible for 95% of what you say and do each day!

This is where subconscious reprogramming (like the hypnotherapy techniques I teach on The Awakened Self Podcast) comes in. Whether it’s through self-hypnosis or working one-on-one with a certified professional, you can access and rewire these deep-seated beliefs, shifting your focus from the problem to your vision for the future.

How to Heal Without Self-Punishment

Here’s my favorite mindset shift: stop focusing on what’s wrong, and start getting clear on what you want instead. This doesn’t mean you ignore your challenges; it means you give more attention to your growth, your progress, and your dreams. With every episode of The Awakened Self Podcast, I offer guided meditations and tools to help you do this—resources you can find in the show notes.

Whether you start with free meditation audios, try the Rewired app, or invest in deeper 1:1 hypnotherapy, my goal is to equip you with the methods to heal and grow without the inner punishment.

In Summary

Self-development doesn’t have to feel like suffering. It’s normal for the inner critic to get loud when you’re striving for growth. But by shifting your focus—and, if needed, doing the deep subconscious work—you can step into healing, authenticity, and success with greater ease and joy.

With compassion and light,
Gianna Badot

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The Awakened Self Podcast is where the science of the subconscious mind meets the wisdom of the soul for conscious leaders, seekers, and mothers on a self-development journey. 

Hosted by Gianna Badot, Holistic Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, Meditation Guide, and founder of The Rewired App, this show is an invitation to slow down, breathe, and wake up to yourself and your life in the deepest way. 

Each week, Gianna blends subconscious reprogramming, emotional healing, and spiritual awakening to help you:
💫 Understand your subconscious mind and the patterns that shape your reality
💫 Reconnect with your intuition, nervous system, and natural inner peace
💫 Integrate success, motherhood, and spirituality in a grounded, embodied way
💫 Live and lead from your awakened self — the version of you that feels whole, peaceful, and fully alive

This podcast is for the conscious human ready to wake up — not just to their potential, but to presence itself.

Because awakening isn’t about escaping your life…
it’s about finally being here for it.

Connect with Gianna on Instagram: @giannabadot